interacting with a slew of different couples at the wedding this past weekend made me realize that the way someone loves a person is completely different that the way someone else loves someone.. if that makes any sense at all.
randy and i aren't the love-note-in-his-lunch or 60-'iloveyou'-texts-a-day kind of couple, but we do show our love for each other in many different ways. we always make sure to greet each other with a kiss. we make fun of each other as often as possible, which results in great laughs that are just between the two of us. my favorite is that when we can't verbally tell each other 'i love you,' one of us will squeeze the other's hand three times, and the other responds with for hand-squeezes for 'i love you, too.' i remember when i was little, my dad and i used to do this to each other, and i integrated it into my relationship with randy, so this gesture holds a great amount of sentimental value for me.
while browsing online, i found this list of 10 different ways to show your love for your partner:
make a decision
this has to do with the power that a person only has within him or herself. you can decide to be open or closed off from another person. you can decide to be fearless. recognize the only control you have is over your own actions.
make food
make observations about the types of foods your lover enjoys and then start stocking them in your kitchen. the beauty of this tip is that it doesn't have to be anything fancy. for example, this past sunday, randy offered to make me breakfast, which is something that doesn't happen often because of our conflicting schedules. he made me scrambled eggs with turkey and brought it to me in bed, and i felt like a princess <3
give a gift
this does not mean trolling amazon until you find something you think you can impress your lover with. buy a small bunch of flowers and surprise your girlfriend at work. frame your favorite picture of you and your boyfriend for him to put on his bedside table.
give compliments
it's no secret this is a big winner with the ladies. commenting on how nice she looks when she gets home from work or how the new perfume she bought suits her will do you fellas a whole 'lotta good. but ladies, don't forget to return the favor. (dad: don't read this part) i love randy's butt - it's the cutest man-butt i've ever seen. so whenever i catch a glimpse of it, i tell him how cute it is and how much i love it, and i can tell it puts a little pep in his step.
give your appreciation
truly appreciate what you have and what the other person brings to your relationship. a good rule of thumb is to treat every gesture like it's the first time it's been done. if your girlfriend does your laundry every week, tell her thank you every week. and notice that she does your laundry in the first place. you can't go wrong.
make a gesture of your very own
do something special - something that you won't find in a relationship advice column or described in a greeting card. the article gives the example of a man cutting up his wife's food into heart-shapes.
be dominant
if you don't speak up in your relationship, you're not going to be actively involved in it, which will just piss the other person off. be in touch with your needs and desires and make sure your partner knows them as well.
be passive
you read this right - it seems as though this would be in direct opposition to the tip just above this one. this one really means letting your partner's needs be more important than your own. i strongly dislike when randy plays video games until 3 in the morning because i don't like being alone at night in bed - it's lonely! but sometimes i try and let him have his way - if the next day is his day off, he has every right to enjoy himself and play nba 2k10 or whatever. if i expect him to watch teen mom with me, i have to play by his rules some of the time too.
be honest
this one is perhaps the most sincere way to show your love for someone - being honest about who/what/why you are. randy knows that i'm super-passionate about my feelings and that i'm a complete control freak, and i know that no matter how hard he tries, there will be times when he can't help but to fart in front of me. yes those qualities sometimes bug us, but at least everything's out in the open, and that speaks volumes.
just show up
instead of calling, texting, emailing, or facebook-ing, get in your car and say what you want to say in person. in a world where technology rules us all, this one will win major points.
until next time..
<3 alaina
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